Tap Ball Act 1: Premium Walkthrough

Nelson’s new skin, a romanian looking building for sport, a skin for Lisa from back in the day we had to send eggs all over our friends town and a store paroding LEGO. This are the premium items offered in the act 1 of the event. Follow us after the jump to read the funny dialogues and quests attached to them in our walkthrough.
First, we’ve the premium building, Sportacus!

Highland Games

Auto starts

70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconAch, a sporting-goods store! Willie needs some equipment for that grand Scottish tradition — the Highland Games!
70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconYou there — clerk! I want to buy a caber. It’s a long, heavy wooden pole, tapered at one end–
sidebar_squeakyvoiceteenI know what they are. Aisle 6.
70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconWait, yer sayin’ you actually carry cabers?
sidebar_squeakyvoiceteenThe sign says “All your sports equipment needs.” I’ve never known a sign to lie.
70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconUsually the way this works is, I go to a store, ask them if they have some ridiculous Scottish thing, and they act like they’ve never heard of it.
70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconThis makes Willie hoppin’ mad. Then Willie punches the clerk and spends the night in jail.
70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconIt’s a grand old time. I was expecting that was how this would go.
sidebar_squeakyvoiceteenNo, sir. Aisle 6 for cabers.
70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconHold on, I’m not done yet. I don’t suppose you stock any Maide Leisg?
sidebar_squeakyvoiceteenScottish for “lazy stick,” used in traditional tests of strength. Aisle 7.
70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconCrivens! How about this — in one particularly silly event, we toss sheafs of wheat over a pole. Highest toss wins.
sidebar_squeakyvoiceteenWheat sheafs and pitchforks are next to the tennis rackets. 20-pound and 10-pound sheafs available.
70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconWhat if another Scot is eyeballin’ my lass, and I need to clock him over the skull with a traditional Scottish skull-clockin’ hammer?
sidebar_squeakyvoiceteenThey’re behind the CrossFit stuff.
70px-Tapped_Out_Willie_IconI can see you’re gonna give Willie no cause to pick a fight. And for that I will be forever sorry.

Task: Make Willie Buy Sports Equipment
Time: 8h
Location: Sportacus

Next, we’ve a skin for Nelson: Football Nelson. It unlocks in the store after completing Balls of Glory Pt. 2.

The Full Nelson Pt.1

Nelson starts

sidebar_nelson_footballHey, Simpson! How come the field is measured in feet instead of Nelson steps?
Bart head iconIt’s not my sport. My Dad invented it. If you want to change the rules, go bully him.
sidebar_nelson_footballMaybe I will! I’ll bully him good!
Bart head iconYes. Oh my God, yes. This is fantastic. Can I watch?
sidebar_nelson_footballHe’s your dad. If you want to watch him get humiliated by a child, I got no right to say no.
Bart head iconYay!

Task: Make Football Nelson Bully Homer
Task: Make Bart Chuckle To Himself
Time: 4h
Location: Stadium Entrance

The Full Nelson Pt.2

Homer starts

Homer HeadListen up, team. I’m not going to sugar coat this — you’re terrible Tap Ball players, and therefore terrible people.
sidebar_apuMr. Homer, I am still not entirely clear on what I’m supposed to do with this bowling ball.
70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconMaybe if the rules didn’t change every five minutes, we could get better.
Homer HeadI mean, I just can’t make it any simpler for you people.

Task: Make Soccer Lisa Kick The Soccer Ball
Task: Make Football Nelson Go Long
Task: Make Pin Pal Apu Bowl For Goal
Time: 4h
Location: Stadium Entrance


The Full Nelson Pt.3

Homer starts

Homer HeadOkay, team. You’ve really been looking sharp lately. I want to try a new play.
Homer HeadBart, run a hook-and-ladder. Nelson, you track down the Golden Snitch. Lisa, bunt the ball for a home run.
70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconI understood precisely none of that.
Homer HeadOne-two-three hike!
sidebar_nelson_footballWhat am I supposed to do, again?
Homer HeadI said hike! The hike has happened! Now go go go!

Task: Make Bart Run Into The Fence
Task: Make Lisa Trip Over The Ball
Task: Make Football Nelson Yell Angrily
Time: 12h
Location: Stadium Entrance

Homer HeadI’m just…not…getting….through to you people.
70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconI’d like to suggest that maybe you’re an awful coach.
Homer HeadThat can’t be it. No, we should just run the play again until we get it right.
70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconBut nobody understands–
Homer HeadOne-two-three hike!

The Full Nelson Pt.4

Lisa starts

70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconIt’s weird. I still have no idea how Tap Ball works, but I can somehow tell we’re awful at it.
Bart head iconEh, as long as Dad’s unhappy, I’m happy.
70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconWell, I’m sorry, but if I’m going to do something, I want to do it well.
Bart head iconIt’s weird that the same DNA could make a you and a me.
70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconWe were doing so well before, though. What’s the secret?
Bart head iconAll I know is, I tend to do my best when Nelson threatens to kick my butt if I don’t.
Bart head iconI’ve never really found any other reason to do well at anything.
70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconHe is a strangely good motivator…

Task: Make Homer Eavesdrop On The Kids
Time: 1h
Location: Stadium Entrance

The Full Nelson Pt.5

Homer starts

Homer HeadGather ‘round, team! I’ve figured out how to make us great.
Homer HeadLet’s run the same play as before. This time, though, I’m authorizing Nelson to atomic wedgie anyone who messes up.
Homer HeadNo team can succeed if it doesn’t bully itself. It worked for John Wooden’s UCLA basketball teams, and it can work for us.
Homer HeadSeriously, watch the tapes. If anyone ever missed a shot, the young Lew Alcindor would subtly purple nurple him on the way back up the court.

Task: Make Soccer Lisa Kick The Ball
Task: Make Pin Pal Apu Bowl The Ball
Task: Make Bart Throw The Ball
Task: Make Football Nelson Score A Ball Down
Time: 8h
Location: Stadium Entrance

And then, we’ve the return of the Balance Beam and Gymnastic Lisa from Whacking Day!

Gymnastic Lisa

70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconMy grade in P.E. is terrible — there’s no plus after my A! Maybe I should take gymnastics for extra credit.
Homer HeadOk, but you need to wear your soccer outfit on the Tap Ball field.
70px-Tapped_Out_Lisa_IconWhy can’t I play Tap Ball as a gymnast?
Homer HeadBecause that’s not what you’re wearing in all the posters, pins and bobbleheads I ordered.
System Message: Gymnastic Lisa is now available in the store!

The last one is one of the cool buildings from the Easter event, the Blocko Store, which only has some text once you place it.

Hip To Be Cubical

Tapped_Out_Milhouse_IconOooh, the Blocko Store! Where, if you can imagine it, you can build it!
Tapped_Out_Milhouse_IconThe doctor says I was born without an imagination. But you guys can all have fun!

This is all for now, join us later for more on this event, happy tapping!


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