Ready to take the bull by the horns? Will Homer be strong enough? Or he needs his dad to do the job and he’ll climb that tall mountain again? Follow us after the jump to start the walkthrough of the final premium items of the event!
The first premium item is Strongman Homer, a skin we haven’t seen since it was unlockable in the Halloween 2013 Event as a tie-in to the Treehouse of Horror episode.
I’m so proud of you Homie, inventing a successful sport. And think of all the exercise you’re getting.
I made the field small on purpose so I didn’t have to run.
Maybe you’ll get fit by accident.
I had a dream that I was fit once.
System Message: Strongman Homer is now available in the store! Only Referee Homer can play Tap Ball though. Them’s the rules.
The second one is the new skin for Grampa, Toreador Grampa.
Bart, did I ever tell you about the time I was a Spanish bullfighter?
Honestly, what’s the best way to stop this story before it starts? Be straight with me, man.
You don’t believe me, is that it? Well, I’ll prove it to ya! El Matador Americano Stupido is back!
First I’ll need a red cape.
The confessional booths in the church have those lovely red curtains. Just the color a bull loves to charge…
Task: Make Toreador Grampa Steal Confessional Curtains
Location: First Church of Springfield
The Abe-ador Pt. 2
Now, the key to bullfighting is to get the bulls good and mad at ya. An angry bull makes mistakes.
You gotta know how to insult a bull. Remember that bulls don’t understand English. They speak Spanish.
Which is why the best bullfighters are all Spaniards. Let me show you how it’s done.
Umm… Grampa, I don’t know where you’re going to find bulls around here.
I don’t know what you’re talking about boy, they’re everywhere!
Task: Make Toreador Grampa Taunt Springfielders
The Abe-ador Pt. 3
Now, once the bull is hoppin’ mad at ya, he’ll charge. That’s when you stick him with your sword, and wait for him to bleed to death.
As a general rule, I approve of all violence. But even I think this sport is disturbing.
I need to get me a sword. Isn’t there a pirate that lives down by the shore?
The Sea Captain? He’s no pirate. I think he mainly leads whale-watching daytrips. Not a happy man.
He talks like a pirate. That whole “argh” thing.
Yeah, and it’s annoying. Funny, you don’t see him around much anymore, do you?
It’s like everybody just decided all at once they were tired of him.
It happens. Disco Stu went that way. Sad. But, back to the mission at hand — time to steal some swords!
Task: Reach Level 15 and Build The Frying Dutchman
Task: Make Abe Steal Swords from the Sea Captain
Location: The Frying Dutchman
The Abe-ador Pt. 4
Got my sword, and I’m ready to execute some majestic animals in the slowest, most painful way possible, to the delight of everyone!
Hey, watch it with that sword. You’re swinging it around like a maniac.
“Maniac” is my trademark! The crowd loved me because I was just as likely to kill myself as the bull.
Most of me is replacement limbs stitched on by Spanish surgeons after I hacked off parts of my body.
Lotta Dr. Frankenstein-types in Spain. Wonderful country, Spain. Great food, great architecture, and great Frankensteins.
Task: Make Toreador Grampa Practice Swordsmanship
On job start:
Abe! You can’t wave a sword around in public!
Now, if it was an AR-15 assault rifle you were brandishing, that would be fine.
It would be especially fine if you were to carry it openly into a restaurant —
— as if you were desperate for someone to challenge your Constitutional right to be a scary creep.
Assault rifles are how we defend freedom and stop bad guys from ever committing any crimes.
It’s why crime has ceased to exist — because everybody is armed to the teeth.
But a SWORD???????? Swords are dangerous!
Aw, come on, Clancy. When he’s slicing and dicing, he’s not talking. And when he’s not talking, my life is wonderful.
Fine. But if he hurts anyone, YOU have to arrest him. AND do the investigating and statement-taking and all that yucky police work stuff.
The Abe-ador Pt. 5
Hey! Why am I waving a sword around? What’s this cape around my neck?
You were being a bullfighter. Just like in the old days.
I was never a bullfighter! How could I possibly have had time, when I was the world’s most celebrated pesterer of convenience store shoppers?
Here, let me show you how it’s done…
Task: Make Toreador Grampa Pester People in Kwik-E-Mart
The final one is the Murderhorn.
Hey, look! A mountain just appeared out of nowhere. That’s… normal, right?
Cripes! I’ve gotten pretty used to entire buildings being erected in 24 hours.
And it certainly makes sense that the construction can be completed instantaneously if you lob some donuts at the building site.
But a whole mountain? Son, I gotta admit. This one scares me.
You hear that, Sky Finger? You scared an old man. Nice going.
You just had to splash some premium currency around, didn’t ya? Couldn’t bear to leave a single item un-purchased.
Now, son. You should thank the Sky Finger for spending its hard-earned money–
No! I’m through kowtowing to the whales! Do you know what it’s like to live in a town that’s constantly changing?
When I look out the window, I never know what I’m going to see! Maybe there’ll be some massive new stadium where Moe’s used to be.
Or maybe a thousand identical blue houses will be crammed up against my backyard fence!
I can’t take it any more!!!!! Just stop already!!!!!
Son… if the whales stop buyin’ stuff, EA will pull the plug on this whole thing tomorrow. They ain’t running a charity.
Then you, me and everyone we know just ceases to exist. Poof!
Uh… hey there, Sky Finger. How we doing? Listen… about what I said before…
Just a joke, all right? We love our whales. Really. You guys are the most special, wonderful, world-paying-for folks in the whole universe.
So what’d say we kick the tires on your latest purchase? Let me at that Murderhorn!
Task: Make Homer Climb the Murderhorn Again
Hey, look — a yeti.
Watch out, Homer! Them snow abominables will eat anything that moves!
Lenny, this is a video game. I could eat HIM if I felt like it. In fact, I AM kind of hungry…
*extremely worried noise*
Oh my heavens, you did it! You ate an entire yeti. I can’t believe what I just saw.
Mmmm… mythical creature. Anyway, it seemed like the easiest way to wrap this mission up. Now… on to the next thing!
This is all for now, join us later for more on this event, happy tapping!