Time Traveling Toaster Act 1 Premium Walkthrough: Hollis Hurlbut

Let’s find out Lisa’s dna origins through the first of the two premium walkthroughs of act 1 of the event, right after the jump!


Museum of Unnatural History

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Lisa: With the awesome power of time travel at our disposal, all the secrets of history will be revealed!
Hollis Hurlbut: Good Lord! I’m just about to publish: “Dishonest Abe: Lincoln’s Hidden Past as America’s Most Notorious Card Cheat”.
Hollis Hurlbut: I’m not sure I WANT that one being investigated.
Hollis Hurlbut: Of course, if I traveled back in time first, and CONVINCED the sixteenth president to take up poker cheating…

Task: Make Hollis Hurlbut Alter the Facts
Time: 4h
Location: Homer’s Workbench or Springfield Historical Society

The Simpson Genome Project Pt. 1

Hollis Hurlbut starts

Hollis Hurlbut: DNA analysis has opened the floodgates of historical inquiry.
Hollis Hurlbut: Anyone interested in a free DNA swab? Learn your family’s genetic roots?
Lisa: Of course! I’d LOVE to know what great peoples of the past I’m related to.
Homer: Lisa, I’m not sure the genetic soup that made me and Bart is a tasty one…

Task: Make Lisa Get a Genetic Test
Time: 4h
Location: Springfield Historical Society
Task: Make Hollis Hurlbut Send Tests Away for Study
Time: 4h
Location: Springfield Historical Society

The Simpson Genome Project Pt. 2

Hollis Hurlbut starts

Hollis Hurlbut: The results are in! The Simpson gene is overwhelmingly Neanderthal!
Lisa: Well, I did hear every person of Eurasian descent has a TINY amount of Neanderthal in them…
Hollis Hurlbut: It would be more precise to say the Simpsons have a tiny amount of human in them.
Lisa: I don’t suppose you’d be willing to change that result? For my peace of mind?
Hollis Hurlbut: Lisa, I’m a historian. Twisting the evidence in whatever way is most convenient is what I do. Consider it done!

Task: Make Hollis Hurlbut Alter the Facts
Time: 4h
Location: Homer’s Workbench or Springfield Historical Society

The Simpson Genome Project Pt. 3

Hollis Hurlbut starts

Hollis Hurlbut: It’s amazing that primitive cavemen could survive into modern times. You should be so proud, Cave Lisa.
Lisa: I’m a straight-A student! I’m not a caveman!
Hollis Hurlbut: Well, I’ll run a few more tests. But Neanderthals DID have larger craniums. It all fits, you see.
Lisa: NOTHING FITS! RUN MORE TESTS!

Task: Make Lisa Get Further Testing
Time: 4h
Location: Springfield Historical Society
Task: Make Homer Go in for Testing
Time: 4h
Location: Springfield Historical Society

Hollis Hurlbut: Homer, Lisa, you both have the largest heads I’ve ever recorded.
Homer: That’s why I’m so smart. Smart as an ape, they all say!
Hollis Hurlbut: Such fascinating primate behavior. What a discovery!
Lisa: I’M NOT A DISCOVERY AND NEITHER IS MY DAD!

The Simpson Genome Project Pt. 4

Hollis Hurlbut starts

Hollis Hurlbut: Lisa, as a peace offering, I brought you a present.
Hollis Hurlbut: Here. A shank of wild boar. I know how your people love big meat shanks.
Lisa: Save it. If I’m a Neanderthal, then I am going to celebrate my history.
Lisa: Besides, do you have any idea how interesting this will look on a college application? Yale, here I come!
Homer: And I get to go on disability!

Task: Make Lisa Study Neanderthal History
Time: 4h
Location: Simpson House
Task: Make Homer Skip Work
Time: 4h
Location: Moe’s Tavern
Quest reward: $200 and 20 XP

Join us next time for more info on this event, happy tapping!

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